The Third Prayer

Love this!  I have not been able to get a good picture of Mary Rene with her eyes open this last week because when I say “Smile” this is what she does!  She gives me a good smile but squints her eyes so tight.  What a little ham.

Seriously.  I’m not kidding.

Mary Rene had a play date last week with Elaine and they were having so much fun playing together in her car bed.  But again, I couldn’t get a good picture.

Well, that one is pretty good.

Mary Rene has become fascinated with my wedding ring and wants to wear it.

I let her play with it for awhile but I’m so scared she will try to eat it so ‘ring playtime’ doesn’t last long.

When Mary Rene visited her new pediatrician last week, he gave me a pamphlet about what to expect at this age.  The pamphlet was very helpful and also gave a list of things to work on and skills to start building.  One thing that it mentioned was potty training.  Around this age, toddlers start to develop more independence and get set in their ways (REALLY? I thought that was six months ago?)  Even though I don’t think she is ready to potty train I went ahead and bought her a potty. 

She always follows me into the bathroom, watches me go, hands me toilet paper, helps flush the toilet and waves bye bye to my business.  So she clearly understands the process.  She was very interested in her potty but she didn’t seem to comprehend the process as much as I thought.

   

And then she took the seat off and put her crayons in the bowl.

Finally, I got her to sit down.

We moved her potty into the bathroom and placed it right across from our toilet.  Every time I go to the bathroom, I sit her on her potty (with clothes on) and say, “mommy goes pee pee, Mary goes pee pee too.”  Then she will sit there and make the peeing noise, “psssss.”  Ha!  I’ll get toilet paper and then hand her some and for some reason she wipes the toilet paper against her mouth.  I have no idea why she does that.

Yesterday was absolutely gorgeous and we walked up to the local park to play.  Mary Rene was having fun playing on the playground, going down the slides, riding the swings, playing in the sand and watching all the kids run around.  At one point she walked over to a couple of kids who were blowing bubbles.  She was mesmerized by the bubbles flying everywhere and soon the kids were blowing them towards her.  I thought it was so cute that the kids including Mary Rene in their fun because they clearly could see she liked the bubbles.  I kept talking about the bubbles as the kids were blowing and soon Mary Rene said the word “bubble.”  What a quick learner. 

On our walk back home I decided to stop for ice cream as a special treat for her….and me.

I can’t think of a better way to end a good day.

Because I have absolutely no time to write, but wanted to share something…

I read the below post on the blog, Reflections of a Paralytic (thanks Meredith!)  Check out her website sometime.  She is a beautiful, Catholic woman, who is 100% pro-life.

After reading her post today, I am just disgusted in the world we live in today.  That we have resorted to these measures to protect.  

[DailyMail] Extra small condoms for boys as young as 12 could soon be on our shelves.

The Hotshot condoms are going on sale in Switzerland after research found that not enough 12 to 14-year-old boys were having protected sex.

The condoms are likely to end up on sale in Britain, said their manufacturer Lamprecht AG.

A spokesman said the UK would be ‘top priority’ if the company expanded abroad, considering it had the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe.

Nysse Norballe said: ‘At the moment we are only producing the Hotshot in Switzerland.

‘But the UK is certainly a very attractive market since there is a very high rate of underage conception.’

Seriously?  How scary is that?  Just thinking about a 12 year old “needing” condoms freaks me out.  So young to understand the act of making love, so young to understand what can happen if the pure act of making love will make a baby.  So young.  Where are the parents?

Weight: 136

Signs of pregnancy: Not too much to report in this area.  I’m really looking forward to my doctor’s appointment on Thursday so I can hear the heartbeat again for reassurance.  Until this baby starts making more defining movements, I’m on pins and needles with no real symptoms.  I guess the only real symptom I have is my lack of milk.  I can’t even tell if I have any at all.  But Mary Rene is still nursing away.

Baby Development:  Sweet Pea is approximately 4 inches long and weights about 2.5 ounces (the size of an apple.)  The eyelids are still fused shut but she/he can sense light.  They say that if you shine a flashlight near your belly that the baby will move away.  We did that with Mary Rene and I never “felt” her move away from the light.

Concerns/Thoughts:Interesting how I followed every single pregnancy rule with Mary Rene and this time…well, I’m breaking a lot.  Eating lunch meat, ate tuna fish on Friday, had a few sips of wine the other night, caffeine here and there, sleeping on my back still (although I am trying to stop doing that.)

When I was halfway through my pregnancy with Mary Rene, Frank knew we were having a girl.  He just had a feeling and stuck with it.  Even when everyone swore I was having a boy, he knew she was a girl.  And she was.  It turned out that at several different doctor’s appointments, Dr. Gosser referenced to Baby P as “she” and even when I was in labor the nurses kept saying “she.”  So it seemed like some people knew all along.

At the beginning of this pregnancy, I thought we were having a girl.  Mostly because we had a girl name selected and not a boy’s name.  And for some reason, I just had this feeling.  But it wasn’t a strong feeling at all.

Then, out of nowhere, I started doing research on circumcision.  With Mary Rene, I didn’t bat my eye once when it came to that topic.  (But then again, I didn’t think twice about vaccinations.)  It was a no brainer-do it.  But this time, I have done a lot of research and realize that I don’t want the unnecessary procedure done for Sweet Pea.  That is, if Sweet Pea is a boy.  (Although Frank still needs to weigh in on this topic and he is supposed to be doing his research.  Have you started?)  So why all the sudden research on circumcision? 

At 12 weeks, Frank started having the feeling we were having a boy.  I asked if it had to do with my circumcision research and he wasn’t really sure.  But Frank is starting to get that feeling already.  Sooner then he got with Mary Rene.

Of course, we won’t find out until Sweet Pea is born and held up into the air.  When those legs are finally spread apart, then we will know.  For now, we are letting God have His little secret.

Either way, we would be happy.  A girl would be a blessing.  A boy would be a blessing. 

A second girl

• Mary Rene would have a sister! 

Being a sister is awesome!  You have someone to talk to all the time about boys and all your issues.  You have a best friend who lives in the same house.  Someone you can call at the last minute for no reason at all and get them to drop everything to hang out.  You can share clothes, toys, friends.  You have someone who really gets you, no matter how crazy you may be.

On the same token, having a sister can be rough.  They can be your best friend and your worse enemy.  They know how to push your buttons more than anyone else.

• We have all the clothes since Sweet Pea and Mary Rene will be born during the same season
• The girls can share a room forever and we don’t have to worry about a bigger house or remodeling the basement
• We would easily out number daddy!  It is already three to one, including Sophie B

The first boy

• Mary Rene would have a brother!

Which I must say, my brother and I have never fought.  But then again, we aren’t as close as my sister and I are or ever have been.

• Frank would have the boy he dreamed about playing ball with all these years
• I would understand why I am doing all this research on circumcision

So there you have it.  Boy or girl, either way we are blessed.

Yesterday we met with Mary Rene’s new doctor, Doctor Richard Knight and I must say, I am very impressed and so very, very happy that we switched.  I felt right at home the moment I walked in the waiting room.  (Although there was only one waiting room which all kids, sick and not sick, go too.  The other doctor’s office had two separate rooms.)  When we got to the waiting room, Mary Rene ran right to the table and chairs and wanted to play with the toys.  I always bring her own toys so she doesn’t play with the waiting room toys (they have lots and lots of germs and well, if a sick kid was playing with them before Mary Rene…..) but Mary Rene would have nothing to do with her toys.  She loves table and chairs and feels like a big girl when she sits at them.  But then she saw the fish tank and jumped off that chair so quick she nearly fell.  She went right up to the tank and pointed at the lonely fish and “ooh” and “OOH!” over and over again.  The receptionist was getting a real hoot at watching Mary Rene.

But that’s not what we are here to talk about.  The nurse led us back to the room and got Mary Rene’s weight and height.  Mary Rene is still 23 pounds (45 percentile) and has been this weight since she turned one.  They said not to be concerned because she is walking and running so much that she is burning a lot of calories.  And trust me, she seldom sits down-she is always on the move!  It is just funny to watch your baby grow out of clothes so quick that first year and then all of a sudden-stop.  Mary Rene is 31 inches (36 percentile) tall which is an increase since her 15 month visit.

We went in the room and the nurse told me that Mary Rene was due for her Hep. A shot.  I instantly froze and my heart stopped.  I was going to be put to the test, right here and right now.  The nurse was really nice and said the doctor would be back in.  My head was racing, “is this vaccine okay to get?”  I couldn’t remember what four vaccines had the tissues from the aborted babies and I knew 100% that I did not want to allow that to happen.  I panicked, wanted to call Frank for moral support, but then the doctor walked in.

His warm smile put me at ease right away and then Mary Rene quickly waved at him and said, “bye bye.”  Dr. Knight and I both started laughing because it was pretty clear that Mary Rene did not want him in there.  Every time he came near her with the stethoscope she would look him dead in the eyes and say, “bye bye.”  It was too terribly cute.

He quickly mentioned that Mary Rene was not due for her Hep. A shot and he apologized for the nurse bringing in the fact sheet on it.  I breathed.  But then he said she was due for it at her two year appointment. 

When I came home I did look back and see that the Hep. A shot is one of the four that contains the tissues from the aborted babies.  So I decided that a month before Mary Rene’s appointment I will call the office to confirm if the vaccine they carry contains these tissues.  If they say yes, then I will ask where I can get an alternative vaccine.  If they can’t get it then I will have them put down in her chart that she will not be getting the vaccine at her appointment. I figured if I do it ahead of time they, and myself, will be prepared when this comes up at her appointment.

So no shots and I instantly felt better.  But I realized this was my opportunity to let him know where I stand.  I told him the story about why we switched pediatricians and how Mary Rene got three and four shots at her last two appointments.  I told him I wasn’t happy about it and I felt like the doctor really pushed me around.  He told me that he has small children and doesn’t want them getting more than two shots at a time.  Therefore, he doesn’t want his patients either.  Awesome!  I was so glad to hear that.  So I know that Mary Rene will not get more than two shots a visit so that solves part of the problem.  The other part will be my job to fix.

So overall, it was a great visit.  Mary Rene is healthy, thriving and doing amazingly great.  And even better, she has a doctor that I can really trust.  He didn’t intimate me like other doctors and I felt completely at ease with him.  Such a good feeling.

We left the room and went to schedule Mary Rene’s two year appointment.  We have it scheduled so Sweet Pea might be able to get his/her one month appointment done the same day.  As we left, the nurse asked if Mary Rene could have a cookie and I felt so good I said yes.  Mary Rene’s eyes lit up and she slowly ate the cookie the entire way home.

The new pediatrician gets an A plus so far.

When we tell Mary Rene to smile, she will either give us a cheesy smile and pose

or look something like this

oh!  She cracks me up!  What a little ham.

A new tooth popped through last week and two more are halfway through.  Interestingly, she hasn’t been entirely too crabby and no snotty nose.  This time we just know she is teething because she keeps chewing on her fingers.  And well, I stuck my finger in her mouth and saw them.

On Saturday we went to the pet store to get Sophie’s nails trimmed.  Let me first say that I really need to start scheduling these appointments so I stop falling behind.  Those nails grow so fast since I’m not running with her anymore and they are so freakin’ annoying on our hardwood floors.  I digress.  The point of this, Mary Rene had so much fun at the pet store.  First there were the birds, then the dogs, next cats and finally her favorite, fish.  She was in fish heaven with the hundreds of fish swimming around.  She kept pointing and “oohing” and “ooooo” as she went from tank to tank.  She melts our hearts with her simple, pure, innocent episodes of happiness over the smallest and most mundane things.  Wouldn’t life be great if we got that excited over trivial, daily items in our life?

We hit a huge, huge milestone yesterday: Mary Rene napped at my parent’s house.  When she was an infant, she would fall asleep anywhere.  But as baby girl grew, she got set in her ways and she would only nap at home, my mother-in-law’s house (that is who watches her the two days I work) and Piedmont (my parent’s property.)  The last time I was able to get her to take a nap at my parent’s house was the day of my sister’s bridal shower which was back in August.  Frank was in charge of Mary Rene and she wouldn’t take a nap for him.  So he drove her to my parent’s house in hopes that she would fall asleep in the car.  She didn’t.  I tried to get her to nap there and she wouldn’t.  So we continued to get ready for the shower.  People arrived, the shower started and Mary Rene was busy crawling from one person to another.  By the time the shower was ending, Mary Rene was well past her morning nap and it was time for her afternoon nap.  She was so exhausted that I was able to get her to take a nap.  Glorious.  But as you can see from the details, she was super exhausted and that might be the real reason she napped.  So honestly, the last time she took a nap at my parent’s house was probably…Christmas 2008.  Seriously.  So yesterday was a huge milestone.  When I went to pick her up, my parents mentioned that she was tired but they couldn’t get her to nap.  So I asked her if she wanted to take a nap and she walked right into “the nap” room and climbed on the bed.  I hanged her her blanket and she quickly tugged on my top.  At first it didn’t appear like she was going to fall asleep but after 10 minutes of nursing she closed her eyes.  But she has done that before.  So I waited another five minutes before I tried unlatching, and well, she wouldn’t let me.  I let another two minutes go by and she still won’t let me.  So while still latched on, I laid down on the bed, continued to nurse for a few more minutes and finally was able to unlatch.  Baby girl doesn’t want to let go sometime.  And…I was able to walk out of the room.  I went in the room where my parents were sitting, Mary Rene-less, and pounded my fist in the air and did a little dance.  I was one proud momma.  About 45-50 minutes into her naps, my dad went to check on her and she woke up.  He is a worry wart!  But the good news is that she napped, regardless of the amount of time.

Okay, that sounded like a huge ordeal, but, I have hope.  If I continue to do this every week then eventually she will associate “the nap” room with naps and maybe nap for my parents too!

My dad had so much fun playing with Mary Rene all day yesterday.  He enjoyed feeding her breakfast and lunch.  She liked it too because he plays the “airplane” feeding game and it was cracking her up.

You may wonder, what else does she do over there?  She currently is teaching the cats to sit.

Okay, maybe teach is the wrong word.  She forces the cats to sit.

She explores every room in the house, and there are a lot of rooms, and she seems to find something new to play with each time.  Yesterday she found my grandma’s scary life size dolls which have always been in the computer room.

Isn’t Mark scary?  Well, Mary Rene didn’t seem to mind.

Mark wears size 2T clothes, bigger then Mary Rene, but Mary Rene sure was showing him who was boss.

Mary Rene has added two new words to her list.  She likes to stand on the window ledge and jump in my arms and before she jumps she says, “WEEEEE!”  So cute.  Frank’s mom has been trying to teach her to say “Happy Birthday” because it is on one of her Barney videos.  Right now Mary Rene says, “hap” for Happy.  So close!  Baby girl is one smart little cookie.

Weight: 136

Signs of Pregnancy:  I’ve had a pain in my butt, or maybe I’m just a pain in the butt.  I know a lot of pregnant women have issues with their sciatic nerve which is located in the lower back.  But this pain is in my butt cheek.  In addition, Frank says I have been really mean.  And yeah, maybe I have been.  But on the good side, I can wear my contacts again! 

Baby Development:  Sweet Pea is approximately 3.6 inches, the size of a lemon, and weights approximately 1.6 ounces.  Our little sweet pea is full of expressions and can squint, frown, grimace and possibly suck his/her thumb!  WOW!  That’s a lot for such a small little baby.  The kidneys are producing urine which is being released into the amniotic fluid.

Concerns/Thoughts:  That I’ll continue to be mean the rest of this pregnancy.

As the old saying goes, you get wiser with age.  And well, you get wiser with the second kid.  I’ve learned a lot since Mary Rene’s pregnancy by watching my friends raise their babies and well, by watching myself stumble and fall here and there.  I think Frank and I have done a fantastic job of raising Mary Rene and I wouldn’t take anything back.  She is who she is because of how we raised her and I love every little ounce of her.  But with Sweet Pea, there are some things I want to do differently and below is a list I have started compiling.  I’m sure once I publish this I will think of more, but I have been working on this post for a few weeks now and want it out of my “draft” folder!  So if I think of more, I’ll just write another post.  On the same token, there are a lot of things I will do the same. 

Feel free to add your thoughts and what you would do different the next time around.  I would love to see what everyone else has to say! 

Labor

• Wait to go to the hospital until I am in more pain or until the contractions are five minutes apart

I think I jumped the gun on this on.  We were excited, nervous, not really knowing what to expect.  Honestly, I felt pretty good and wanted to stay home longer.  But Frank and his mom both thought we should go to the hospital, so we did.  We got there at 7 p.m. and waited, and waited, and waited.  It wasn’t until early the next morning that I had the opportunity to push.  I think I could have easily stayed at home for another few hours.  That would have given Frank and myself some alone time, to work through the contractions together and really experience the birthing process.  The hospital setting just got in the way.

• Don’t get an IV

Or at least try not to get it right away.  I didn’t know that you had the option not to get it.  An IV makes you retain water which isn’t really a good thing.  Drinking water is much easier and then you can still move around freely.  Plus it took them four attempts to get the IV inserted and that was just painful.

• Walk the hospital and don’t get strapped to the bed

This goes along with waiting to go to the hospital.  We got there at 7 p.m. and by 7:35-7:45 p.m. I was laying in the bed with an IV and the baby monitor strapped to my belly.  Laying down is not cool and makes your contractions worse.  I took the child birth classes for a reason!

• Don’t let them break my water to speed up labor

That was just plain ridiculous.  If I can hold off and wait to go to the hospital, and hold off on the IV, and hold off getting strapped to the bed, then maybe I can hold off here too.  Getting my water broken made my contractions 10 times worse and well…the nurses gave me the nickname “Puddles.”

• Try for drug free

If I wait to go to the hospital, don’t get the IV right away, don’t get strapped to the bed right away, don’t get my water broken, then I can work through more contractions which would make it slightly easier to have a drug free delivery.  I was doing fine without the epidural until they broke my water.  That was just some quick, no nonsense pain that I didn’t think I could handle.  And the anesthesiologist was just waiting outside the room with his needle.  Plus, Mary Rene was so sleepy from the epidural that nursing in the beginning was tough.  On top of that, we had to pay the anesthesiologist for his services and for the drug.  I think that ended up costing us $400-500 towards our deductible.

• Have Frank take pictures from the side where you can see Sweet Pea’s face!

I am very happy that Frank got some pictures at all but all of the “first” pictures don’t show Mary Rene’s face.  You can only see the back of her head, my face and the nurse. 

• Have Frank get a picture of Sweet Pea’s first meal!

I didn’t get a picture of Mary Rene nursing until she was about six months old!  And honestly, that is the only picture I still have to this day.  Nursing has been such a huge part of our lives together and I want to remember these precious moments.  Including that first meal.  Some of my friends got pictures of that first meal and they are so precious.  I don’t think there is anything more amazing then a newborn baby, just minutes old, suckling on his/her momma’s breast.  That is why God gave women breast in the first place.

The Hospital Stay

• Hold my baby more

I feel like the only time I held Mary Rene was when I nursed her.  There was either someone visiting or we had her in the bassinet.  I want to cuddle more while I can because when I get home, I’ll have two kids to take care of and I know my cuddle time will be limited.

• Get out of bed more

I only got out of bed to go to the bathroom and change clothes.  I was in the mindset that I was on a mini-vacation.  Basically I paid the price when I got home because recovery was rough.  (Recovery was actually worse then labor and delivery.)  When I finished running a marathon, I never sat down at the finish line.  I would walk around, stretch out a bit and make sure to walk a lot the next day.  Same should go for labor and delivery.

• Walk down to the nursery

Heck I didn’t even leave my room with Mary Rene.  When we went to sleep at night we would send Mary Rene to the nursery so we could get some rest.  Frank walked down there every night to check on her and he would come back and talk about her in the swing and he wanted me to come see.  I was being lazy. 

• Sleep more

Well this is obvious.  When I get home I won’t be able to send Sweet Pea to the nursery for the night.  Plus I’ll have two kids to take care of so I need to sleep while in the hospital.

• Limit visitors

I’m going to sound like a complete scrooge here but I really need to be firm on this.  I was so happy to share Mary Rene with the world that both of our entire families and all of our friends came to visit at the hospital.  It was an exciting time and we loved the company.  But I didn’t realize how exhausting that would be.  Throughout the day, there are different hospital staff members (your doctor, your nurse, baby’s nurse, baby’s doctor, dietitian, lactation consultant, house keeping, insurance person, lunch lady, Eucharist Minister, baby photographer, etc.) in your room nearly every hour between 7 a.m. and 8 p.m.  I seriously am not kidding here.  There is little alone time or rest time with all the medical stuff you need to do.  Add that on top of a constant stream of visitors and you are overwhelmed.  Plus as a new mother I was afraid to nurse in front of anyone so every time we had a visitor I wouldn’t try.  Which meant I had to learn to nurse when I was at home, alone, and that was so stressful.  Sure this time I am more confident and really don’t care if I nurse in front of my family and friends.  But the extra rest and alone time would be nice.  Plus once you get home, you really need the help.  So a visit from a family member or friend means so much more when you are in the comfort of your own home.  And not wearing a hospital gown! 

• Understand all the paperwork I am signing

Point blank.  I don’t even know what I signed most of the time but I just signed it to get it over with because I wanted to keep the line of people moving that were in my room (see above comment.)  But this time I am going to be more cautious about what I sign and be 100% confident in my signature and approval.

• Try to get an earlier release

Is it really necessary to stay two nights?  I don’t think it is if you and the baby are doing really good.  I had some blood clot issues the first day with Mary Rene but they were gone by the second day.  If I would have asked, maybe we could have been released and I could have spent the second night in my own bed.  Plus, I can’t bear to think of being away from Mary Rene that many nights in a row.

• Since I am paying for it, take two of the booger snot sucker outer things

You can’t buy one that even comes close to pulling out snot like the hospital brand!  No joke!

Nursing

• Be comfortable nursing in public, anywhere and everywhere

There were so many times that I would hide in a bathroom, a dressing room or even go in a separate room when at family functions.  I need to represent nursing mothers and not be ashamed.  The only way to properly educate others on the importance of breastfeeding is to do it. 

• Don’t use a nursing cover

It draws way too much attention.  You pretty much have a huge billboard over you that says: NURSING BABY HERE!!!!!  I found that just wrapping a blanket around Mary Rene worked much better than the cover.  But honestly, I think I learned to be more discreet nursing in public when I just did it without any type of cover.  There were many times that I would be nursing Mary Rene and my brother would come in the room and start talking to me.  If he knew what I was doing he wouldn’t have been in the room with me.  I was so discreet about it that he thought she was sleeping. 

• Learn to nurse laying down sooner

I think Mary Rene was about six weeks old before I even attempted to try this.  That meant the first six weeks I would sit all the way up in bed, every two hours to nurse for 20-30 minutes to nurse.  Basically, I was wide awake and had a hard time getting back to bed.

• Don’t watch the clock so much in the beginning

Just nurse until Sweet Pea is done.  No need to switch every 15 minutes like they tell you to do in the hospital.  When I stopped watching the clock with Mary Rene, she started getting the hind milk which is the best part.  Baby girl put on some weight quick!

• Master nursing on one side and holding an empty bottle on the other side to catch let down

I’m a leaker, a serious leaker and I don’t think that will change with the second baby.  Double letdown baby.  I had to wear nursing pads until Mary Rene was 11 months!  No kidding.  Instead of pumping milk to get ready for my return to work I want to try and catch the milk from the other breast into a bottle.  I had a couple friends that were able to do this and it cut down on their pump time.  In addition, there is no good reason to have a wet, soaky pad of milk when it is good milk that can be used at a later date.

• Avoid red sauce!

I heard all the warnings about green vegetables and spicy food before pregnancy and stayed away from those foods.  But nobody warned me about red sauce and that was a huge, huge disturbance to Mary Rene’s belly.  We were so lucky to receive so many cooked meals from friends the first two or three weeks.  The only problem was that most of them contained red sauce and Mary Rene was crabby and didn’t sleep much those first few weeks.  Now I realize it was the red sauce.  I will definitely limit my red sauce intake until Sweet Pea is a few months older so I can keep that belly comfortable.  And well, that way momma can sleep more.

Baby Wearing

• Do it more

I wore my Moby Wrap a lot but not as much as I could have worn it.  I am currently sewing a ring sling so I will have two different slings to wear.  I think if I keep Sweet Pea in the sling for a good portion of the day, nursing and napping, then I’ll have more time to be hands on with Mary Rene. 

• Learn to nurse in my sling

I can already picture myself sitting on the couch for 30 minutes, every two to three hours, while Mary Rene roams around the house.  It would be nice to be able to go in the backyard and walk around while Sweet Pea nursed.  Or go grocery shopping and let Sweet Pea nurse while I do some shopping.  Time saver and oh so convenient.

Sleeping

• Always, always, put Sweet Pea back in the co-sleeper when I am done nursing

Always, always do this.  It was a bad habit I started with Mary Rene.  Main reason she is still in our bed.  I love co-sleeping but wish I would have kept her in the co-sleeper which would have defined her special place to sleep.

• At three or four months, start sleep training

Put the baby to bed when he/she is awake.  We didn’t do this with Mary Rene and well, we didn’t get to this point until she was 15 months.  Don’t get me wrong, I love the way we have raised Mary Rene, but the many, many nights of rocking a 23 pound baby were exhausting.  Plus, it is hard for other people to get her to sleep.  We need more options with Sweet Pea.  I hate the thought of sleep training but I know I need to work on it sooner with Sweet Pea.  Mary Rene was only able to fall asleep being nursed or rocked for the first 15 months.  Convincing her to sleep on her own was hard, not only for her but for us.  It would be nice to have Sweet Pea learn how to go to sleep on his/her own at an earlier age.

• Try to get Sweet Pea to nap on his/her own when he/she is three to five months old.

I still have to nurse Mary Rene to nap everyday.  It addition, Mary Rene doesn’t nap for Frank or my parents.  Frank’s mom has to rock her to nap still.  It would be nice for Sweet Pea to nap for everyone, regardless of the situation and where he/she is at that given time.

• All naps in crib

I got in the bad habit of letting Mary Rene nap on the couch.  Now, she naps in our bed.  Which actually is great because she takes longer naps in our bed because she is so comfortable there (pillow top mattress!)  But I want to make sure Sweet Pea naps in his/her crib so when he/she is placed in the crib so a connection is made that it is nap time.

• Around three to four months, take turns with Frank on who helps put Sweet Pea to sleep

For the first year, it was primarily my job to put Mary Rene to bed because she would only nurse to sleep.  When she wouldn’t fall asleep nursing then I would rock.  If I got tired and tried handing her off to Frank she would scream bloody murder.  Which just made it easier for me to do the job.  Sweet Pea needs to learn to fall asleep for anyone, not just mommy that way I can catch a break.

• Have a place for Sweet Pea to nap at my parent’s house

Mary Rene really didn’t have a place to nap and to this day, I still can’t get her to nap there.  If Sweet Pea has a place to sleep from the beginning then it will be easier to start the napping process.

 Vaccinations

• Don’t get Sweet Pea the Hepatitis B shot at birth

Which goes back to “Understand all the paperwork I am signing.”  I see no reason at all for my child to get a vaccine the day he/she is born.  Especially since I don’t have Hepatitis B.

• Be firm in my decision and don’t let anyone talk me out of the choices I am making for my child

Be firm, really firm.  I’ve spent way too much time researching vaccines to let someone push me around.  There are reasons that I am going to do what I want to do and I need to stay firm with whomever stands against me.

• Delay vaccinations

I wish I would have done this with Mary Rene but I didn’t know what I know now.  I just can’t understand why all those vaccines are needed in such a short amount of time.  I believe vaccines are important but they need to be spaced out.  Plus, Sweet Pea will not, under any circumstance, be getting any vaccine with tissues from an aborted baby.

Leaving the House

• Get outside more in the beginning

Even if it is just in the backyard or a walk around the block.  Fresh air is good for Mary Rene, Sweet Pea and me.  All parties win.  That is why I have a sling.

• Go to my parent’s house more often 

I didn’t do this in the beginning with Mary Rene and she had extreme separation anxiety.  For the longest time, she didn’t want to be alone over there.  It was hard for me to watch and hard for my parents to deal with too.

• Let my parents watch Sweet Pea more than I let them watch Mary Rene

Again, she had separation anxiety with them and I felt horrible for her and my parents when they were alone together.  I want Sweet Pea to feel more comfortable around my parents so they can be alone with him/her more often.

What I want to do the same

No pacifiers

Waiting to start solids until at least seven months

Breastfeed

Cloth diapers

Co-Sleep

Wow.  That was a mouth full.  Did you fall along?  Now tell me what you would do different the second, or third or fourth, time around.

Thursday, December 17th:

I had been extremely tired all week and really wanted to go home and take a nap.  My co-worker, Laurie, asked if I wanted to go on a walk and I quickly said yes because I was close to crashing at my desk.  We were only walking for about two minutes when I blurted out, “I think I’m pregnant.”  She got very excited and hugged me.  I told her how I had been out of the ordinary tired all week and I remember feeling like this the week I found out I was pregnant with Mary Rene.  I went on to explain that I should be starting my period that weekend but I really didn’t know if that was an accurate guess since this would be my first normal cycle since getting it back.  Yes, I said it.  It was my first real menstrual cycle since….2005.  I just couldn’t believe that I got pregnant my first try with Mary Rene and here I was again, my first real, true cycle since then and I’m pregnant again.  Am I that lucky?

At that time I hadn’t even mentioned to Frank that I might be pregnant because I didn’t want to freak him out.  We weren’t necessarily planning on trying but really, when you do it, you do it and you know there is a chance.  But honestly we didn’t really put it into consideration since I hadn’t had a regular cycle since 2005.  So the conversation never came up.  In addition to freaking him out, I was afraid to admit it out loud that I might be pregnant, and then find out I wasn’t.  I would have been devastated because honestly, I had already started to fall in love with the thought of being pregnant again.

So I asked her not to say anything until I took the pregnancy test that weekend.

Friday, December 18th:

I was emailing back and forth with my friend Katie and told her that I might be pregnant.  She convinced me to go buy a pregnancy test that day at the Dollar Store.  But they didn’t have any.  And neither did Dollar General.  So I took it as a sign that I should wait one more day.

Saturday, December 19th:

I still had no signs of starting my period and at that point, I knew I was pregnant.  I could just feel it.  But I wanted to take a test to make sure.  I still haven’t told Frank and I decided I would take the test and then tell him.  The only problem was that he was going to a concert that night and would be out with his friends.  I didn’t want to take the test before the concert and not be able to celebrate with him.  And I didn’t want him to worry about it the whole night because I knew he was looking forward to going to the concert.  So that afternoon while Frank stayed home with Mary Rene, I ran to the grocery store to pick up some odds and ends, including a pregnancy test.  Later that night when he left, I ran to the bathroom and took the test.

And there it was, clear as day, a positive pregnancy test.  I really wanted to share the news with Frank but knew it wasn’t the right time.  So instead I told Mary Rene that she was going to be a big sister and she swore to keep the secret.  We immediately left the house and ran to Babies R Us to buy a “Big Sister” shirt.  They didn’t have any.  So once she went to bed, I started to sew my own.  Well, I didn’t like it so instead I took a silver marker and wrote “Big Sister” on one of her pink shirts.   

Sunday, December 20th:

I woke up before Frank and went to the Christmas tree to pull off a link from our Advent prayer chain.  I pulled off “pregnant women” which meant we were to spend the day praying for pregnant women.  My heart just stopped and knew that it was God’s will.  Interesting enough, I blogged about pulling this particular link off the chain.  Frank was still in bed when I went to Mass and Mary Rene and I continued to keep our secret.

By the time we came home from Mass, Frank was up and getting ready to walk out the door for church.  Directly after Mass he was going to his hockey game.  So again, I kept the secret.

Finally, finally, hours later when he returned and it was just the three of us, finally, I was able to tell him the news.  He talked about his game, blah, blah, blah and when he was done…

I handed him the link from the tree.

My hand was shaking when I said, “Today we are praying for pregnant women.”

He just stares back and me and doesn’t know where I am going with this.

“We have a very special pregnant woman to pray for today.”

I started to cry.

And he knew.

And he was happy, so extremely happy.  He began to cry and we hugged.  And all my concerns were washed away.

Oh what a fun week!  Mary Rene went to the mall and also had two play dates this week!  Talk about a busy week for a little girl.

We’ve been to The Mills Mall several times before and Mary Rene has never seemed to notice the big carousel in the middle of the food court.  But this time we let her ride the miniature carousel which was near the ice rink and she had a lot of fun.  When we got to the food court, her eyes lit up and she stared and pointed at the large carousel.  I let her out of the stroller and she instantly darted towards the carousel.  Frank wasn’t too happy at first because he was hungry and there was no line at Subway.  But I gave him those puppy eyes and he obligated and came over to the carousel.

So Mary Rene got to go on her first carousel ride. 

She was being a little ham for the camera.

It was cute because she was kicking her feet when the horse would start going up in the air.  She was really “riding” him.  When the ride was over, each kid got a horse stamp on their hand.  Mary Rene was fascinated by her stamp and kept pointing at it and talking very excitedly.

Later that night, we went over my friend Laura and Jason’s house for dinner.  We really need to do this more often because the kids played great together and we were able to sit back and relax and not worry about what the kids were doing.

Caden is 2.5 years old and was so cute because he wanted to keep hugging Mary Rene and kept saying her name in the cutest voice ever.

I can’t remember but I think in the picture below he is about to hug her or he is saying, “GIRLFRIEND, WHAT’S UP????”

That is little Cole playing with his toys in the corner.  Mary Rene was in love with him last time she saw him but this time she had Caden to play with instead.  I guess the older boy wins.

Yesterday she had a playdate with two different boys but she didn’t seem to care about them.  I guess she only has eyes for Caden now.

The sleeping arrangements?  Ugh.  They aren’t working out as great as we thought.  I’ve been moving her into her crib when I come to bed but every night around 2 a.m. she crawls over into our bed and finds her way in my arms.  It is interesting because 2 a.m. to 3 a.m. used to be the time she would wake up to nurse.  Her little biological clock is still wired to wake up at that time and come be with momma.  Some nights I don’t notice that she crawls into my arms until I wake up with a stiff neck.  But some nights she is so loud as she crawls over and gets herself comfortable that I can’t help but wake up.  Take last night for instance, my left arm was under my pillow when she decided to crawl over.  So she started digging under the pillow for my arm which made her start kicking my side.  I pulled my arm out and she quickly nestled her face against it and put her back against my belly.  Picture “spooning.”  But that wasn’t enough.  She wanted my right arm on her belly.  So she grabbed my right arm, which was resting on my thigh and she put it on her belly.  After a few minutes I moved my arm off but she started whining and grabbed my arm again.  When I woke up this morning we were snuggled in the center of the bed.  So needless to say, she runs the entire house.  I have to keep reminding myself, this is only a short time in my life.  Someday I am going to miss this so I need to soak it up while I can.