This is one of my favorite passages in the Bible: “Then Jesus told him, ‘Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.‘”  The famous Doubting Thomas passage in the Bible.  Thomas followed Jesus for three years yet he still wouldn’t believe until he touched the holes where the nails were and placed his hand in Jesus’ side.  But then Jesus appeared and proved to Thomas that he was the risen Lord.  And in return, Jesus gave you and me a blessing. 

It is almost as if Jesus knew His words would be recorded and for years and years they would be repeated.  Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.  So many times I have to lean on that passage.  I’ve never seen the face of the Lord yet I believe.  I pray to Him daily and constantly ask Him for help yet I don’t even know what He looks like.  And just the simple fact that I believe, He blesses me. 

Peter denied Him three times.  The rest of the disciples abandoned Him in His darkest hour.  Yet, when He rose from the dead, the first place He went was to His disciples.  He didn’t rub it in their faces that they left Him.  He didn’t scold Peter for denying Him.  He said, “Peace Be With You.”  And then he blesses us. 

It humbles me to think how much God truly loves us.  He loves us so much that He gave His only son.  That is pure, unconditional love.  So many times I don’t feel worthy of the gift.  So many times I fail and turn my back on the Lord.  Yet He welcomes me back with open arms.  He blesses me because I believe.

Many times when I am feeling weak and vulnerable I have to repeat this passage.  I have to remind myself that I believe without seeing.  I don’t need to see a miracle to believe.  I just believe.  Sometimes you have to trust in your faith and jump out of the boat to get to the other side.  It is a wonderful gift that God has given me and I feel blessed to have the gift of believing without seeing. 

Until I see the face of the Lord, I have to rely on my faith.  Without my faith, I don’t know where I would be.  I can guarantee I wouldn’t be here, writing on The Third Prayer.  And I can guarantee that the third prayer wouldn’t have been answered.  My blessed life is all due to God.  He alone has given me these wonderful gifts.  He truly has blessed me.  And for that I believe.

For those with a weak stomach, this may not be a post for you.

Sophie has diarrhea, yet again (right now she is eating vanilla ice cream laced with Metamucil.)  It seems to happen every couple months.  It clears up in a day or two but I still have to deal with clean-up.  I was just thinking that in six months I’ll be cleaning up poop for my dog and my kid.  Yeah, I can hardly wait.

I was hanging out with my friend Laura yesterday and she mentioned how her son had a case of exploding poop.  It somehow went all the way up the diaper and up his back.  Apparently this is pretty normal for kids because I remember one of Frank’s friend’s daughter having her pee fly out her diaper onto my couch.  How does that work?

I realized last night that I haven’t changed a diaper in about 15 years.  I don’t have any nieces or nephews and I never babysat my younger cousins.  I’ve watched people change diapers and it looks pretty simple.  But the exploding poop up the back kind of freaks me out.  And then I keep hearing about the wonderful first few months of stuff that people call poop but doesn’t resemble poop.  Lovely.  I’m sure it compares to my dog’s diarrhea.

I’m sure this changing diaper thing will come natural like all the millions of other motherly things I have no clue about.  It just amazes me that one day you are you and the next day you are you and a mother responsible for a human being.  They don’t give you a manual or anything.  They just pull the baby out and hand it to you.  Have a nice day!  But I’m sure that motherly instinct kicks in right away.  Right?

Frank hasn’t changed a diaper in years either.  Although he might just be saying that…

I have made a very important decision in my life.  Going forward until this baby is born; I will try my best to sleep in on Saturdays.  I used to always get up at 6 a.m. for a Saturday morning run.  Even the days I didn’t run I would get up by 7 or 8 a.m. to do odds and ends around the house.  So many people say it is important to wake up the same time of the day everyday of the week.  Well, I am going to through that theory out the door for the next six months. 

Today Frank and I slept in until 10 a.m. and it felt really great.  I cooked a good breakfast and now we are watching very corny teenie booper cartoons on tv.  We are living the life.

In six months, we won’t be able to do this.  So enjoy it while we can!

I thought the second trimester was supposed to be easier then the first?  My first trimester was really great!  The best part was I had no morning sickness.  But since I hit the second trimester I have not only been an emotional wreck but I have been a zombie.  I got seven hours of sleep last night but by 1 p.m. I was having a hard time staying awake.  As bad as I wanted to come home and go for a run before RCIA, I decided my body needed sleep.  At 5 p.m. I closed my eyes for a short nap.  At 7:20 p.m. Frank came home and woke me up!  I missed RCIA.  I was too tired to cook or do anything so Frank grabbed me some healthy McDonald’s.  While he was gone getting my dinner I just wanted to cry.  I don’t know why, oh yeah, hormones.

On top of sleeping all the time and being on an emotional rollercoaster I have been forgetful Jones.  The week started off no food to eat (hence the McDonald’s), I forgot to pay a bill which meant our account went to zero, this morning we ran out of toothpaste, and who knows what else.  The other day for some unknown reason I put this dirty, smelly, wet rug (flood damaged) in the dryer.  I turned the dryer on and ran it through a cycle.  Hello!  An hour later I went to take the clean clothes out of the wash machine and put them in the dryer but there was this smelly, wet, pink rug in there.  Dirt everywhere in the dryer and it smelled like a wet dog.  So idiotic. 

I’m usually really good about being on top of things but my mind is elsewhere and I can’t seem to get small task accomplished without leaving myself a note.  Here is the note Frank left me on the kitchen table last night:

“Make Jeep payment Prego!  ha ha!  I love you!  Frank“ 

At least he has a sense of humor about it.

Weight: 139.5

Signs of pregnancy: Belly is growing.  Hormones are high.  I was an emotional wreck on Monday.  Crying for no reason.  But Frank was an angel and calmed me down and took good care of me.

Baby Development: Baby P is the size of an orange!  (I still haven’t mastered eating one of those yet.)  Baby P weights about two ounces.  I still can’t feel Baby P moving but Baby P spends a lot of his/her day getting exercise in my womb.  In a few weeks I should be able to feel my little runner getting his/her workout in my belly!

Thoughts:  If I don’t go into labor until the week I am due, and if I am able to take off a complete 12 weeks, I will be off until the week after Thanksgiving.  That means I will only have to work four weeks until the end of the year.  Which means, I will get the end of the year bonus.  Hmm….

I had a pretty good day until I got home.  For some reason I just got really upset and wanted to lay down on the couch.  I laid there watching the clock tick as I waited for Frank’s call.  As soon as he called to tell me he was on his way home the flood walls broke open and I just started crying.  I was a mess.  I know, I know, it is the hormones.  But my goodness, where the heck did it come from?  Frank was a real dear and told me to just lie on the couch and he would be home as quick as he could.  He got home and held my hand as I cried about nothing.  It was a typical Seinfeld episode.  He cooked dinner and cleaned up the kitchen while I just whined on the couch.  Then we walked the dog.  I started to feel a lot better. 

Frank is always telling me to put things into perspective.  And it really helped tonight.  I was getting stressed about nothing and everything all at the same time.  So many things are out of my control and I just need to learn to stop, relax and enjoy the moment. 

Which took me to this picture.  This picture was taken on the second day of our honeymoon.  Frank was relaxing in the water letting the waves hit him as I stood behind him taking a zillion photos.  Frank finally told me to put the camera down and join him in the water.  We went out further, up to our waist, and were having a good time splashing around and acting like newlyweds.  And then all of a sudden Frank said…

my ring is gone. 

Sure enough, his wedding ring was gone.  We panicked and frantically searched like idiots in the ocean for his ring.  We actually had about 10 other people nearby volunteer to help us.  At one point I got really upset and started crying.  Frank just held me and said it would be okay.  We had wedding money and would use it to buy a new ring.  We called off the search team and decided to leave the water for the day.  We went back to the bar and started drinking.  The next day he bought a coral ring and wore it the rest of the trip.

Losing his ring was meant to happen because we came home and bought a new one.  Then Father John, the wonderful priest who married us, said he would re-bless his ring.  We met Father John in the church and we stood in front of the St. Joseph’s statue.  Father blessed his ring and then handed it to me and I recited the wedding vows as I placed it on his finger.  Then Father said a special prayer about our desire to be parents and asked St. Joseph to look over us.  It was such a touching moment.

This story helps put things into perspective.  Losing the ring was a blessing.  So sometimes losing my cool can be a blessing too.

My sister bought me two Bella bands, black and tan, so now I can fit back into those size 6 black dress pants.  It basically is this 100% spandex tube-top looking piece of fabric that fits around my waist.  I am able to wear my pre-pregnancy jeans without buttoning the top by placing the band over the top of the jeans.  The band is great and I’m very happy to have more pants to wear.  The only problem is this band is really made to hold a baby belly bump.  Right now my bump is barely a bump so I have all this extra fabric around my stomach.  When I looked in the mirror this morning I really looked pregnant!  I should have taken a picture to share.  But that would be spoiling all the fun.

Have you counted your blessings today?  What a glorious day!  Jesus Has Risen From The Dead!  Alleluia!  Praise the Lord!  We have been saved from our sins!

The Easter Vigil last night was beautiful.  Last night we welcomed eight new members into our parish.  For the last eight months, every Thursday and a few occasional weekends, they have been learning about the Catholic faith and understanding the importance of the Sacraments they would be receiving.  I feel like I have really gotten to know all these people, especially Emily, the woman I was priviledged to sponsor.  Watching them get baptized and receive the Sacraments of the Eucharist and Confirmation brought me to tears.  It amazes me how secular our world has become yet so many people are still flocking to Jesus.  So many people are asking for Jesus to enter their lives.  And year after year they are given the opportunity to do such at the Easter Vigil.  God is good! 

I have been honored to be apart of this process at our church.  I’ll never forget the day I was asked to be an RCIA sponsor.  I still thank God that I was asked.  Being a sponsor has changed my life.  I have learned so much about my faith that I sometimes feel like this experience was for me.  Last night I felt like I was renewing my commitment to the Lord.  Jesus entered my heart in a profound way last night.  I truly feel blessed today.

Enjoy your Easter Sunday!  Hug those you love.  And praise God for the amazing gift of life.

Yesterday started the Easter Triddum, the three-day celebration of our redemption from sin.  After The Lord’s Supper Mass (last night) and until the Easter Vigil tomorrow, Frank and I will not be partaking in any forms of entertainment (Frank said I needed to write though so feel loved.)  No TV, No internet, No email, No gossip.  This morning my cell phone rang twice.  I checked the caller ID and it was a client in Arkansas.  I turned my phone off. 

These three days we are going to let the Lord wrap His love around us.  We are going to allow the Passion of Christ to really sink in.  We are going to be still, and listen as the Lord speaks to us.  We are going to slow down and give the Lord a chance to enter our lives fully.  Something we should do more often but we allow are busy lives to take over. 

Last night’s Mass was amazing.  We are so blessed to have Father Stanger who has been given the gift of words and always gives a good homily.  He really got us both thinking last night about being a servant.  Jesus, our King, our Savior, knelt down and washed the feet of his 12 Disciples.  Even the Disciple whom He knew would betray Him.  Those feet didn’t wear socks all day.  They didn’t have a nice pair of sneakers to keep them clean and soft.  Those feet wore sandals which allowed all the elements of the world to hit them.  Jesus washed those feet.  It humbles me.  There are so many times in my life when I walk away from someone who needs my help.  I think I’m better then them.  Or even times when I don’t allow someone to help me because I’m too proud or don’t feel worthy of the attention.  But last night I realized that I needed to be washed with God’s love and in return I need to wash others with His love.  As a Christian it is my duty to love and serve.  I realized last night that I could do a better job as a Christian and wash more feet.  God puts me in so many situations that allow me to lower myself to a servant.  I just need to do it.

So these next two days I will be praying for God to open my eyes.  Don’t let me turn my back on the ugliness of the world.  Instead, let me be like Jesus, a servant for His people.  Allow me to help others around me even when it is a grueling task.  And also allow me to accept the help of others when it is needed.

Enjoy these next few days with Christ.  Allow Him and His amazing gift to enter your life.

Side note:  Today’s reading is really beautiful and if you get time today, open your Bible and give it a good read.  Isaiah 52:13-53:12.  It was written many years before Jesus’ arrival.  Yet it echoes the Passion.  The Holy Spirit was definitely with Isaiah.

Today is Holy Thursday.  It seems like Lent just started yesterday and now it is coming to a close.  I really like Holy Thursday Mass.  It is so peaceful and beautiful.  I am looking forward to Mass tonight because the RCIA candidates and sponsors will be really involved in preparing the Altar for the Eucharist.  Tonight Father Stanger will wash the feet of members of our parish before celebrating the Eucharist.  I think it is important for the candidates to be involved so they can better understand this wonderful gift we have been given.  2,000 years ago on the night before Jesus died, He took bread and gave thanks.  He said to His disciples, “This is my body, which will be given to you; do this in memory of me.” (Luke 22:19)  The Holy Order was instituted on this night through the Eucharist.  We are priviledged and honored to be still doing this 2,000 years later.

Jesus knew what was upon Him and He accepted it.  He didn’t come to save just the Jews.  He came to save us all.  The rich and the poor, the popular and unpopular, the faithful and the faithless, the young and old, the peacemakers and the criminals, the born and the unborn.  He came for all of us regardless of what we have done or what we will do.  He came to save us all from our sins.  Today is an important day to remember this amazing gift He gave us.  Life Everlasting.