As I start to prepare for Sweet Pea’s birth, I have been walking down memory lane with Mary Rene’s birth. I looked back in my blog and realized that I never wrote down her birth story. My good friend Jenny K wrote down some brief details the day she was born, but I barely finished the story (this is the best I did.) If I would have written the story shortly after her birth, the story would sound much different. But now, after knowing what I know and allowing myself to come to terms with everything, I’m sure the story sounds different. So here is how I see the birth story now.
Monday, Sept. 15, 2008:
I woke up around 5 a.m. with light cramps. They reminded me of my bad period days, years and years and years ago when I was in high school. I kept thinking about Midol, my miracle cramp drug, and how badly I wanted a piece, or two. But I knew that wasn’t an option because…this was the first stages of labor. I just knew it. I had my 10th doctor’s appointment at 10 a.m. so I just had to sleep off the cramps for a few more hours.
I remember going back to sleep for a couple more hours and eventually getting up to soak in the bathtub. The cramps were very light and were approximately 20-25 minutes apart. They were very manageable but it was obvious that something was going on with my body. Frank decided to call into work so he could attend my doctor’s appointment just in case we were going to have the baby soon.
We went to my appointment and Dr. Gosser confirms that I was having contractions. I actually had one while he was checking my cervix. But the contractions were so far apart and so light that he said this could easily go on for a couple more days…or he could see me later that night. So we went home and Frank decided to go to work. I had started my maternity leave on Friday so it was my first day off work. I decided to just take it easy, lounge around the house and take another bubble bath. The bubble baths were nice and really relaxed me (did I even add bubbles or is it just nicer to say bath with the word bubble in front?) I could easily have stayed in the tub all afternoon but I was getting antsy and decided to clean up a bit. (Future water birth in store?)
3 p.m.
The contractions started to pick up, about 15 minutes apart (I’m guessing) and they were getting to the point that I had to do something. I got on my exercise/yoga/birthing ball and watched a little tv while I did some breathing exercises. This lasted for a good 45 minutes until I got distracted and couldn’t focus on my own. My dad had already left for work and my mom was resting before she went into work that evening. I didn’t want to wake her so I called my mother-in-law, Joanne, and asked if she would come over.
4:30 p.m.
Joanne arrives and she finds me pacing in the backyard. I told her that the pacing was helping so she asked if I wanted to go for a walk. I’m very fortunate that Joanne walks approximately 60 minutes every day (to help manage her diabetes) so she didn’t tire during our little adventure. So walk we did. We went down the street, turned right, make another right, turned left and found ourselves in front of Uncle Frank and Aunt Rosemary’s house (Aunt Rosemary is Joanne’s mom’s sister.) Uncle Frank was standing outside so we popped in to say hi. Aunt Rosemary happened to be on the phone with her daughter Laurie and the whole family got to learn that I was in labor. We chatted for about 15 minutes but standing still made the contractions worse so we continued on our walk. We finished the street and turned left back towards my block. I think we walked around the block a few more times, ran into one of my neighbors and Joanne told them I was in labor. At this point I wasn’t up for small talk so luckily Joanne was doing it for me. We timed out our walk perfectly and got back to my house a little bit before Frank got home from work.
5:30 p.m.
The contractions were easy to manage while I was walking but now that I was back home I felt a little out of control. I sat on my birthing ball and Frank got out his piece of paper and started to time my contractions. He timed my contractions for about 30 minutes and said they were coming five minutes apart. In our birthing classes they said not to come to the hospital until the contractions had been five minutes apart for one hour. But since we weren’t timing them before we were afraid they were already five minutes apart for an hour and we decided we should leave for the hospital.
(This is where the story changes for me.)
6:15 p.m.
We pack up the Jeep and leave for the hospital. Luckily I was thinking ahead and asked Frank to bring an empty bucket. Between calling family and friends, I vomited the entire way to the hospital. The 30 minute car ride was unbearable. Note to self: do not talk on my phone on the way to the hospital with Sweet Pea. Do not let Frank talk on the phone either. Do your breathing exercises. Focus, focus, focus.
7 p.m.
We sign in and are escorted to a laboring room while the nurses get my paperwork in order. They tell me to take off my clothes and get into a gown. I change clothes and Frank and I patiently wait in the room for further instructions. The contractions keep coming and I do some breathing exercises but all I can think about it Frank and me being alone in the room. I’m not really sure what we are supposed to do and I want someone to come in and give us instructions.
7:30 p.m.
A nurse finally comes in the room and has some more paperwork for me to sign. We sign the paperwork, whatever it was and are ready for further instructions. She has me get into the bed so they can hook me up to the fetal monitor so they can check on the baby. The fetal monitor is hooked up and the machine starts beeping and the chart starts moving showing the baby’s heart rate. They add the cuff to my arm so they can monitor my blood pressure. Every few minutes, the cuff gets tight as it takes a reading. This started to get really annoying because it was taking readings nearly every 20 minutes, so it seemed. They add something to my finger, I can’t remember what, but it was monitoring my heart rate. Either the cuff on my arm or the thing on my finger was constantly beeping for a good hour or so and the nurses couldn’t make it stop. They said I was doing fine but the machine was acting up and well, I had to deal with the noise.
8 p.m.
The anaesthesiologist arrives to talk to me about the epidural. I tell him nicely that I don’t want the epidural and would prefer Stadol. He tells the nurse to get me started on an IV so they can get the Stadol going. Even though I don’t want the epidural he has to go over the procedure with me just in case I decide to get it later. He discusses the epidural, pros and cons, and then ask me to sign a waiver. I sign it.
8:15 p.m.
The nurse attempt to get an IV started. It takes four painful tries and they are finally successful. They start to pump me with Stadol.
9 p.m.
The anaesthesiologist comes back in and ask if I want an epidural. I say no. Frank heads down the hallway to greet our family that has arrived.
9:05 p.m.
The house doctor comes in, along with a nurse with a long pointy instrument. He instructs me that he needs to break my water to speed up labor. I’m told to spread my legs and he inserts the long pointy instrument and…pop, my water breaks. Water gushes everywhere, I mean everywhere. The nurse quickly has to change the bed pad and comments that she hasn’t seen that much water come out of a woman before. Lovely. I am soon nicknamed, Puddles.
9:15 p.m.
Frank comes back in the room and I tell him that they broke my water. Soon my brother and sister walk in the room. This part is a complete daze to me. I remember trying to do small talk with them but the contractions are starting to get really strong. It never crosses my mind to get out of the bed and walk around. By this point, I have been in the bed for nearly two hours.
I lay there and fight through the pain. I don’t do any breathing exercises because I just can’t even think.
9:45 p.m.
The anaesthesiologist happily walks in the room, with his magic cart wrapped in a red ribbon (joking.) He ask if I am ready for that epidural now. I quickly say yes and he turns and gets his cart. He responds, “I knew you would want it once they broke your water.”
My sister and brother leave the room and the nurse ask me to lean to the side of the bed. Frank stands next to me and just as I move to the edge of the bed, a huge gush of water drops on his feet. I hear the nurse calling me Puddles again, blah blah, whatever. Just do it already.
10 p.m.ish
The epidural has been administered and the nurse has me roll to both sides. The anaesthesiologist walks back in the room and ask if I can feel the contractions. I can still feel them on the left but not on the right. He realizes that the medication only went to part of my body so he needs to do it again. This time the nurse moves me to the left first so the drug will take effect on that side.
10:20 p.m.ish
The anaesthesiologist comes back in and ask if I can feel the contractions. My answer is no, I can’t feel a darn thing.
A catheter is inserted since I will no longer be able to get up and use the restroom. As I write this, I am just now realizing that I must have gotten out of the bed sometime between my arrival and now to use the bathroom. I mean, really, I must have used the bathroom.
I am told that I will get fluids through the IV and can munch on ice chips but nothing else.
10:30 p.m.-11:59 p.m.
I don’t feel one single contractions. Not an ounce of pain. I spend this time resting, taking short naps here and there. My family no longer comes in the room but Frank occasionally goes down the hall to give them updates while I nap. The cuff on my arm keeps tightening around my arm every 20 minutes or so, which is very annoying. (I realize now that there is no need for that!)
During this time Dr. Gosser visits to see how I’m progressing. He does a vaginal exam and I’m getting close. He just got done delivering another baby and is going to rest until I get close to delivery.
Tuesday, September 16th (12 a.m. to 2:20 a.m.)
The nurse, whom has been with me this entire time, pretty much runs the show. She is awesome and I am so thankful for her. She is calm, sweet and the most perfect nurse I’ve ever met. I wish I could remember her name but I do have a picture of her coo-ing over Mary Rene. I decided not to upload the picture though because Mary Rene’s head is all distorted.
My parents, sister, brother, Frank’s parents and sister are all in the waiting room down the hall. Frank continues to give them updates while I nap. I don’t find out until much later but they found a window in the hallway and were able to look out the window into my room! They can’t see me, thankfully, but they are able to see the rear entrance of the room and can tell when people come in and out.
The nurse does vaginal exams periodically and finally announces that I am at 10 centimeters.
2:20 a.m.
I am at 10 centimeters and the nurse tells me I can start pushing if I want. She ask if I feel the urge to push and I honestly can’t feel a darn thing. She says we’ll start in five minutes and she starts prepping the room.
2:25 a.m.
The stir-ups are pulled up so I can put my legs in them. My legs are like logs and Frank and the nurse have to lift them into the stir-ups. My right leg is completely numb since it got a double shot of the epidural. I really thought the drug would have worn off a little by now but it hasn’t. Since I can’t feel the contractions, the nurse relies on the fetal monitor and each time I have a contractions she tells me to push.
I push as she counts to 10 and then I am told to stop, breath, relax. Approximately two minutes later, I am told to push again. She counts to 10 and then I am told to stop, breath, relax. Two minutes go by and I am ready to push again. After the third push, she tells me that I am not pushing correctly and gives me a good tip to help the pushing go faster. Frank reminds me that it is the same tip his cousin Laurie told me, and that I reminded him to remind me about it. Well, I am not of sound mind at this time so everything presented before this point has gone out the door. So for the fourth push, I push the way I was told, like I am having a bowel movement. She counts to 10 and then I am told to stop, breath, relax.
She is very happy with the way I pushed and said that I made some significant improvements. She can see the baby’s head and sees some hair. Frank takes a look and says it looks like blonde hair. I don’t believe him but when they ask if I want a mirror I say no.
The nurse continues to tell me when each contraction starts so I know when to push. While I’m pushing, she massages me below to help expand the skin. Talk about leaving your modesty at the door!
3:30 a.m. ish
I am really close to delivering so the nurse gives Dr. Gosser a call and he says he is on his way.
My sister and dad, who are at the secret window, see the nurse wheel in a bio-hazard cart and see Dr. Gosser walk in.
I continue pushing every two minutes for 10 seconds. I am getting really tired and some of these pushes only last six seconds. Frank is my little cheerleader and is counting with the nurse and after every push he tells me how great I am doing. He can tell I am getting tired and he gives me words of encouragement before each push.
3:41 a.m.
Dr. Gosser tells me, “one more push and we’ll find out if we have a little Mary Rene or a Luke Francis.”
3:42 a.m.
With one push, out comes the baby’s head and with another push out comes the shoulders and the rest of the body. The room is filled with a loud cry and Dr. Gosser notes that the baby has a good set of lungs.
An eternity later
Dr. Gosser is finally able to spread our modest baby’s legs and we find out, she’s a girl. A sweet, precious, perfect, little baby girl. The nurse wraps her in a blanket and immediately hands her to me. While she is on my chest, the nurse cleans her off and I am in complete awe.
Blonde hair, blue eyed sweet baby girl. Not at all what I imagined but I am completely captivated by her beauty and innocence.
Frank is standing next to me, crying and I can feel the love spilling out of him onto us. He gushes over his perfect little angel and repeatedly kisses me on the head.
Dr. Gosser lets me know that I tore a little and he needs to stitch me up. I don’t even notice what is going on down below, don’t feel a thing, because I am head over heels in love with this angel.
My sister announces to everyone that I had the baby because she sees camera flashes going off in the room. Frank does a good job of capturing the moment. Although a few days later when I look at the pictures, I noticed he had a couple shots with my legs still spread and Dr. Gosser finishing up the dirty work. I deleted the pictures instantly.
Frank holds his precious angel for the first time.
He had a slight cough that morning and he was afraid to get our angel sick. The nurse gave him a face mask and he wore it on and off for the first couple days of her life.
Frank later mentions that he watched me delivery the placenta, something I didn’t even feel or notice. I didn’t even see it.
4 a.m.ish
The nurse interrupts our lovefest and ask me if I want to try and nurse. Yes, yes I want to try and nurse. My mind goes completely blank and I can’t even think about what to do. The sweet nurse helps me get Mary Rene positioned correctly and I try to get her to latch on. After a few attempts, she finally gets her mouth around me and barely sucks. The nurse mentions that Mary Rene has been through a lot and we should try again later. I agree.
4:30 a.m.ish
Somehow the room is back in complete order and I am cleaned up to the point that I can have visitors. Frank gets my parents, sister, his parents and his sister. They all come in and fall in love with the baby in my arms.
I hold her in my arms this whole time, not once giving her up. I have eternity to share her with the world but for now she is mine.
The nurse says it is time for everyone to leave so they can give Mary Rene her first bath. Everyone decides to go down the hall to watch. Frank is a dear and he videotapes this for me.
Now that I am alone with the nurse she tells me that I need to try and get up and use the restroom. I lean over the edge of the bed and as soon as I try to stand I get really light-headed and feel like I am going to faint. The nurse quickly catches me and helps me get into a wheelchair. She reminds me that I lost a lot of blood and the drug is starting to wear off and I am really weak. That makes me feel some what better but I am close to crying.
She says she will wheel me to the bathroom. She gets me to the bathroom, helps lift me on the toilet so I can try and go. I don’t remember if I went or not but eventually she helps me off the toilet and I’m back in the chair.
5:30 a.m. ish
Frank is back and a nurse brings in Mary Rene. I hold her in my arms and we are escorted down the halls, proud parents, to our new room for the next two days.
And our new lives begin.
