The Third Prayer

When you have a blog, and people actually read it, and you write about how crappy you feel, people respond.  Thank you for all the sweet comments that you left.  I appreciate all of you.  Like Rae said, “this too shall pass.”  And I only have a month to go.  It won’t be that bad. 

But besides sweet comments on my blog…

• I had a huge slice of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Cheesecake from my dear friend Nicole C. yesterday (you know the way to my heart-through my tummy! Thanks sweetie for always listening to me and being there for me!)
• I had company for dinner and then a trip to the ice cream shop from my dear friend Nicole B. yesterday (well, you know the way to my heart too-through the tummy! Thanks for stopping by on such short notice and keeping us company while Frank was out.  Made my long day much shorter.)
• I had a lunch date with my co-worker Laurie today at the Cheesecake Factory where I indulged, again, but with Reese’s Pieces Cheesecake (Thanks Laurie for taking me out-I needed it after the work week I’ve had!  Thanks for listening to me complain-once again-about my work drama!  Only you would understand!)

But there are other ways to comfort me besides food.  Today, Mary Rene and I…

• Took a trip to Shane Co. to make my wedding band, engagement ring and Frank’s ring all nice and shiny like new (can’t wait to start wearing my ring again in a month!)
• Without an umbrella, walked slowly into Target and laughed as Mary Rene buried her head in my chest and watched her laugh away as we got wet (can’t say it enough but I love getting stuck in the rain when I’m pregnant!)
• Went to Target, browsed nearly every aisle and bought a bunch of junk.  Love me some junk.  And well, it makes it easier to checkout when you have breast pads (in preparation for nursing) and super huge, thick pads (in preparation for afterbirth) in your pile of junk.  Makes the cashier think twice about giving you and your protruding belly a strange look.

Maybe part of my reason for feeling depressed is because I haven’t been out shopping lately.  I’m not a materialistic kind of girl but getting out and about with Mary Rene is what I’m used to doing.  We are two busy bodies and this weather has kept us indoors like a bad case of winter.  So today at Target, we took our time going down the aisles.  We played some dress-up and I pulled out my handheld mirror to show Mary Rene how dazzling she looked.

If the purple flowered headband wasn’t $6.99 I would have bought it. Not a practical purchase at all when you are on a budget but seriously I would have because she looked so darn cute and for once, she didn’t pull it out of her hair.  She liked it too.

So I’m feeling better today.  The temperature is actually cool outside and I’m looking forward to getting out once my sweet little girl wakes up from her nap.  (screw the housework, it will be here when I get back.)  Maybe we’ll hit the local Goodwill and do some shopping.  Who knows where the day will take us.

Happy NFP Awareness Week!

I never really thought about being a mother growing up.  I dated a guy for 1.5 years and another guy for three years before Frank and never once did I think about being a mother, or a wife, when I was with them.  But the moment I met Frank, I knew he was The One.  And with that came my desire to be a mother.  I guess you can say that is what separates him from my past relationships-he was the full package and put all the desires in my heart that the Lord entailed for me.  A pure and true sign that he was my soul mate.

When we started to get serious in our relationship and the topic of marriage and family came up, I would tell Frank that I wanted five children.  Like I said, the Lord put the desire in my heart to be a mother.  Frank was the polar opposite of me and was thinking one or two.  But I had dreams of a big family with lots of little ones running around.  I don’t know why I wanted a big family but it was something I dreamed about as our relationship progressed.

While engaged we took the Natural Family Planning (NFP) classes and talked about waiting a little bit to start a family but never really put a timeline on it.  The night before our wedding, I had fertility signs.  By this time, I had been tracking my fertility signs for four months and I knew the approximate number of fertility days I had until I would ovulate.  I timed it out in my head and we would be on our honeymoon.  I remember talking to Frank on the phone and telling him I was fertile.  With NFP if you don’t want to achieve pregnancy you avoid intercourse during your fertile days.  Well, that was not an option because we were looking forward to our wedding night for quite some time now and we weren’t about to wait any longer.  So we decided to use the fertile days and see what God had in store for us.

We didn’t get pregnant so we took that as a sign that God was not ready for us to be parents.  After talking to my nurse I realized that the allergy and motion sickness medicines I was taking during the trip could have ‘dried’ me out enough to not allow a pregnancy.  After hearing that, I never took those allergy pills again.  The thought of becoming pregnant but being too dry to hold a pregnancy just made me sick.

So for the next year, we diligently followed my fertility signs, avoided when we thought necessary and ’practicing’ when we wanted.  And to do that, it takes a lot of strength and will power.  All the stars can be in perfect alignment and the desire can be so great in your heart, but it is something you just know you can’t do.  NFP really brings you closer to your spouse because you have really raw and open conversations about your sexuality.  Sex isn’t just sex anymore but it becomes about life.  New life that is.  You know that the simple act of love can create life.  Sure you know that with using contraceptives as well, but when you practice NFP and know you are fertile, you really know that that very one action of love can result in a child nine months later.  It is why we call it making love and not sex.

When Frank quit his job, one month before our one year anniversary, we knew we had to wait a little longer to start a family.  But the desire to become a mother was growing so much stronger in my heart everyday.  I easily could have lied to Frank and charted wrong and used a fertile day and “oops” get pregnant.  But my desire was never strong enough to lie to my husband.  

Five and a half months later he found a job and that night, I told him it was time to change the way we looked at my chart.  I remember watching that chart for the next two weeks and anticipating my fertile days.  And when they arrived, the week of Frank’s birthday, we had a fun week planned.  I always tease Frank about how he stretches his birthday out for days by planning day after day of activities.  Well that year, he had a good weeks worth of activities.  I think he can thank my fertility for that.

And so, Mary Rene was conceived.  And our love grew deeper and stronger for each other, and for her, each passing day.

With breastfeeding, I didn’t have to worry about charting anymore.  Sure some women get their fertility back quicker when they nurse but I happen to be an exception to the rule.  I was only working twice a week so my lack of pumping encouraged more milk production.  I didn’t start Mary Rene on solids until she was seven months and even then she barely ate what I offered.  By her first birthday, 75% of her intake was still milk.  She dabbled with food here and there but she was a milk girl.  And I was completely fine with that.

But after spending a weekend pumping on my sister’s bachelorette party and the following week going on a business trip, my supply started to change.  And so did Mary Rene’s eating habits.  Within a few weeks I started to get hints that I would be starting my cycle again.  It wasn’t until the week of my sister’s wedding in October that I had a very unusual and light period.  I still thought it was a fluke because it was so abnormal, short and just not what I expected.  Frank knew but we really didn’t discuss charting.

Then November came around and after the five days with my friend ‘Flow,’ I thought there was a chance it was back for good.  We should have started charting right then and there but we didn’t.  And two weeks later, Sweet Pea was conceived.

I guess God knew we shouldn’t be charting.  He had bigger plans for us and we are so thankful for the stars all being in perfect alignment.  He set the stage for us and we accepted our roles and welcome the standing ovation-a baby nine months later.  I’ve thought about this all so many times and what wouldn’t have been if we would have charted.  And I’m thankful for “not being responsible.”  So I have my diligence with NFP to thank for Mary Rene and I have my lack of diligence with NFP to thank for Sweet Pea.  NFP-I owe you for giving me the two sweetest gifts in the world.

Is there a sweeter, more precious word in the world than, mommy?  I doubt so.  Not ma ma, mama or mom, but the perfect, mommy?  Is it not every mom’s dream to hear her child utter the perfect, “mommy?”  Although ‘I love you’ is  a close second.  Mary Rene has perfected the perfect mommy and it is music to my ears.  I could hear her say mommy all day long and it doesn’t get old.  So what if it takes an hour to put her to bed.  Hearing her say “mommy” first thing in the morning, priceless.  And her ‘I love you’ is so cute as well.  At first it was ‘I’ but now it is “I you’ with such love.

Mary Rene has become quite the vocabulary copy cat and is saying everything we say.  Which is very adorable as she is our little parrot repeating our every word to the best of her ability.  I love this stage.

I also love dress up and Mary Rene’s favorite accessory are her purple sunglasses (glasses.)

She wants to wear them everywhere, mostly indoors though.  Nine out of 10 times she puts them on upside down though, which is actually much cutier then right side up.

 This past week has been all about Piedmont.  Frank, Mary Rene, Sophie B. and I headed down Friday morning to meet my parents who were already there.  This would be our first adventure in the new minivan and with Mary Rene sitting forward.  She was having fun playing peek-a-boo with me through the headrest.

Speaking of peek-a-boo

Love her little contagious laugh at the end of the video.

The one downside to sitting forward is her chair doesn’t recline anymore.  Which means naps in the car, don’t seem to be as comfortable.  But she still made it work.

I could take pictures of her sleeping everyday.  So precious.

Saturday morning we got ready for Clearwater Lake, THE BEACH, and apparently Mary Rene was in more of a hurry then we were.

If we set her clothes out, and she can reach them, she will try her best to get herself dress.  Sometimes she gets it on right but swimsuits…not so much.  So mommy dressed her and she looked fabulous.

We gladly played the part of Beach Bums and soaked in the sun for a good three hours.

And water bums too.

I asked Frank to get a picture of Mary Rene giving me a kiss but she decided to wipe her sandy hands on my face instead.

Sunday morning, Frank and my dad rented a john boat and did some serious drinking fishing.  Us girls, we hung out on the beach again.

Sunday happened to be my 31st birthday (happy to be celebrating with the two people who gave me life-my mom and dad, and the two people who make my life-Frank and Mary Rene.)  Since Frank left me in the morning to go fishing, I was a good wife and gave him a nice going away gift.

Besides the obvious fact that I didn’t finish painting his toenails, he is a man with pink toe polish.  And well, when you are renting a boat, you usually don’t wear socks.  So yes, someone pointed out Frank’s “cute” toes.  Love you honey!

That night, Frank surprised me with a birthday cake and we indulged.

What a great birthday weekend, spent with the people I love.

Four weeks ago, it didn’t even cross my mind.  Three weeks ago, it vaguely crossed my mind.  But last week it quickly became a reality.  We are a minivan family.

After the uncomfortable car ride leaving the fire department on July 5th, Frank and I started talking about upgrading our family vehicle.  Sure the kiddos were save in the back of the Jeep but the driver, primarily me, was not safe.  It clearly was a safety hazard for me to be driving that close to the steering wheel.  I didn’t feel comfortable knowing that my air bag most likely couldn’t protect me in a wreck.

My Jeep was paid off two years ago and we still had a loan on Frank’s car.  It made sense to trade his car in and buy a larger vehicle.  But the Kelly Blue Book price for his car wasn’t as promising as my Jeep.  Unfortunately, we couldn’t trade in my Jeep for a larger vehicle because we would have two loans.  So I did the next best thing and decided to sell my Jeep to a private party.

Last Tuesday, on a whim, I posted my Jeep on craigslist.  (If you’ve never used craigslist, you must give it a try!  We love craigslistand have gotten so many good deals.  My mom just bought a crib with mattress for $40, barely ever used.) Our friends, Emily and Christopher, had just sold their own vehicle that way and said we should give it a shot.  Kelly Blue Book actually gave a higher retail price for selling to a private person then a dealership so it looked like we could come out ahead.

So the ad was placed and the next day I received the first call.  A very nice gentleman was eager to look at my Jeep but Frank was putting Mary Rene to bed and I knew it would be a long night.  So the following day, the gentleman and his wife came by and took the Jeep for a test drive.  I explained everything about the Jeep and why we were selling it.  I honestly have never had any mechanicalproblems with my Jeep, only a cracked windshield and a minor scratch on the side.  The Jeep has been good to me since the day I bought it nearly five years ago.  I never had any problems with it and told them how much I loved my Jeep.  I guess they saw my sincerity and realized I wasn’t trying to sell a lemon.  And well, the protruding belly also helped when I mentioned we needed to upgrade.  They said they would like to discuss it and would get back with me.

I went back in the house and told my mom what happened.  She looked out the window and said they were still sitting outside.  And soon there was a knock on the door.  And with the knock came an offer.  And with the offer came an acceptance.  And with the acceptance came a deposit.

And with that, my Jeep was nearly sold.  I quickly called Frank and told him the unbelievablenews!  I really didn’t think I would sell my Jeep that quick.  But I was honest with the people and sold it for an honest price, no high mark up, so they got a great deal.

The best part is we sold it for much more than we own on Frank’s loan so we have extra, much needed money.   Which will be nice since I will be out of work for a couple months taking care of a baby.  And when you are part-time you don’t get any benefits like short-term disability or maternity leave pay so…yeah, we need the money!  God had a great plan for us and we didn’t even know it.

That night we went to look at minivans.  Since Frank was going out of town it was our only free night to look before my Jeep would be officially sold, as of Monday.  We got to the first dealership at 5:57 p.m. and were told by the salesperson that all dealerships close at 6 .m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  He briefly showed us a Dodge Caravan, very nice, with a good price, but we couldn’t go for a test drive.

We left the dealership and I was planning on driving home since ‘all dealerships closed at 6.’  Frank asked if I would drive across the street to look at the minivan we saw online.  And would ya know it, they stay open until 8 p.m.

And would you know it, we ended up buying a minivan that night.

And would you know it, Mary Rene loves “mommy’s new car.”

She loves all the extra room and was having fun playing in the van.   That was until the two carseats were installed and she realized it wasn’t a toy anymore.

We are loving our minivan, minus the fact that a cable wasn’t connected to the battery and I had to get a jump, which lead to me taking it back to the dealership for a new battery.  Yes, besides that, we love our minivan.  So spacious and sporty. 

I felt like a mom when I was pregnant with Mary Rene.  I really felt like a mom when I held her for the first time.  But driving a minivan adds a new dynamic to this “mom” title.  Now I feel like even more of a mom then before.  Strange, but a minivan will do that to you. 

Happy travels.

This week has been better with the sleeping issue but we are nowhere near where we were before.  But I keep reminding myself, is that somewhere we really need to be?  Mary Rene is much different than other kids because, well, she is Mary Rene.  She is very independent when it comes to playing and being creative, but at night, she wants the comfort of being with a parent.  I looked back and we honestly only had about two months of her going to bed in her crib alone.  The other 20 months of life, we did it.  And that’s where we are again.  And apparently that’s where we need to be.  I need to keep reminding myself of this because each night I forget and I get frustrated all over again. 

I hate to do the “cry it out” method because hearing her cry is gut wrenching but some nights that’s where we are with sleep.  There have been a few nights where I have walked out of the room and shut the door.  I hate doing that but if I don’t, I will lose my mind.  And when we walk back in the room, she grabs our head, pushes it down on the pillow next to her.  She softly cries as she calms down and stares in our eyes.  As if she is saying, “I will stay here sleeping as long as you sleep too.  Please don’t leave me.  I’m begging you, please don’t leave me.“  Really it breaks your heart.

And it breaks Frank’s heart more.  The pregnancy hormones are getting to me and I’m just fed-up.  I hate to feel that way but laying in there watching and waiting until she falls asleep is hard for my body at night.  I start to have coughing fits which takes her longer to settle, my legs start to stiffen up and Sweet Pea starts kicking me.  The bigger I get, the more uncomfortable and I can’t just lay down to sleep.  I need to sit and relax on the couch for a good hour so my body can “slowly shut down” for the night. 

I would love to have the sleeping situation figured out before our little one arrives next month.  But I need to be realistic with myself.  Our little girl knows what she wants and she is definitely holding out.  And well, since we give in most nights, she knows how to work us.

So last week, I gave in, and in a big way. While Frank was at work, I moved our queen size bed out of our new room and moved it back into our old room.  I moved all Mary Rene’s toys and the floor pad into the empty room.  Basically I moved a lot of heavy objects, something I knew would make Frank very upset in my condition, but my hormones took over and well, you can’t stop a pregnant woman.  Just try, I dare you.

So now, Mary Rene has a playroom, with her dresser/changing table and our dresser.

The other room has become the sleeping room with a toddler bed, crib, queen size bed and soon a co-sleeper.  Although I’m thinking that instead of using the co-sleeper we can turn the crib back into the side rail bed like it was a couple months ago.  Save some space.

Sure the three beds make the bigger room much smaller but, Mary Rene was beyond happy.  She was so happy to help me move all the blankets, pillows and stuffed animals.  And once the bed was set up, she  moved all her blankets and stuffed animals from the toddler bed and put them on the main bed.  Clearly setting her claim and making herself “home.”  She knew what had taken place and was very happy.

My plan was to have her sleep in the toddler bed but we would be right next to her.  In the middle of the night it would be much easier for her to slip into our bed.  Mary Rene hasn’t liked the plan though and when it is time for bed, she quickly makes it known that she WILL be sleeping in the main bed.  And well, she has won every night since I moved the bed.  Once she has finally fallen asleep, we have been moving her to the toddler bed.  Even though she will wake up in the middle of the night and move to our bed we are getting her used to her bed.  And well, we are getting a few hours of good sleep with the extra space.  Really need to consider that king size bed.

But enough talk about sleep.  These sleeping issues have caused so much anxiety that it seems like some nights that is all Frank and I talk about.  Sleep, sleep, sleep.  Blah, blah, blah.  But luckily, we are still finding time to stop and smell the roses/flowers.

Or at least Mary Rene is.

The other day I had my swimsuit sitting on the couch and Mary Rene decided to play dress-up.

She could easily be in the next Star Wars film wearing my maternity swimsuit. 

Just for grins, for those that think Mary Rene only looks like Frank… 

Here is my kindergarten picture.  I see a lot of Mary Rene in the youthful version of myself.

Mary Rene is talking away and saying more words and phrases then I can count.  She is growing way too fast for me and I can’t keep up.  Baby girl is growing in so many different ways.  It makes me so sad how fast it goes by.

Have you ever stopped and thought about how great it is that life doesn’t turn out the way you want?

My senior year of high school, I applied and was accepted to Southern Missouri University in Cape Girardeau.  I went down with my parents for an orientation and even signed up for classes to take the following fall.  But it would have been a two hour drive from St. Louis and my then boyfriend, who was a year younger then me, was heartbroken.  So I chose puppy love over a four year university and decided to go to the local community college the first two years.  Thankfully I liked that guy enough to stay home which leads me to where I am today.  With Frank.  With Mary Rene.  With our soon-to-be Sweet Pea.

After completing my two years at the community college, I was offered a scholarship to Missouri Western University.  Not only did the university offer to pay two full years of tuition, but they also were going to pay me $500 a month for living expenses.  Along with this offer came the job to be editor of their newspaper.  Sweet deal for a college student.  But again, the school was far away and my then boyfriend, different guy, didn’t want me to leave.  So I chose puppy love, again over education and decided to go to a four year university closer to home.  No scholarship.  No living expense stipend.  Nothing at all but puppy love.  Thankfully I liked that guy enough to stay closer to home which leads me to where I am today.  With Frank.  With Mary Rene.  With our soon-to-be Sweet Pea.

I gave up my passion of journalism and public relations for two boys at different points in my life.  (Somehow I ended up in commercial real estate????)  I thank God for those silly boys that helped me make those decisions, which at the time killed me academically and eventually killed my career choices.  But I am thankful for those decisions.

Which lead me to Frank, Mary Rene, and Sweet Pea. 

I love how everything works out the way it should.  Nine out of 10 times, you wouldn’t realize why something happened at the given time.  But later on, you’ll look back, and you’ll be thankful for the choices you made.  A choice that at the time you thought was really stupid, a choice that even a year later you thought was stupid (especially after the break up!)  But a choice, once everything is settled, you’ll be thankful you made.

I’m thankful for all the bad choices I made in my life.  Every wrong turn ended up making a right turn somewhere along the way.  I’ve learned from the mistakes I’ve made, tried not to make them again, even though I have time and time again, but I’ve taking my errors and turned them into principles I can apply in life.

I don’t have any regrets; none at all.  And I’ve done some terrible things, I’m sure of it.  But all the ugly in my life has led me to here, sitting at my dining room table, listening to Sophie B snore while Mary Rene naps in the other room.

I didn’t become a world famous journalist like I wanted to as a young adult.  I’m sure that has to do with the choices I made when it came to puppy love.  But I’ve become something better than famous, I’ve become me.  And honestly, I love who I have become because I’m surrounded by such great people that make my life fulfilling.  More fulfilling then any New York Times Bestseller could do.

Cheers to making bad decisions, learning from them, and becoming the person you are today.

We all have crosses to carry in our lives.  It could be a job you hate but you have to go to everyday.  It could be fertility issues or rough pregnancies.  It could be a bad relationship with a family member or a spouse.  For me, my cross is my daughter’s sleeping situation.  And if that is the only cross God is going to give me at this time, so be it.  Sure it can be hard at times, very frustrating, (did I say very frustrating?) but I accept my cross and I will carry it. 

Each child is different and thus, no two children are expected to have the same routines.  I can’t spend my life comparing one person’s child to mine and I won’t.  I love my daughter for who she is, even with this rough sleeping situation we are going through at this current time.

I don’t want to sugar coat things in my Tuesday updates but this sleeping situation is very stressful for our family.  It isn’t just about losing sleeping anymore.  We are beyond stressed which spills out into our marriage.  And frankly, it spills out into being a parent as well.  I don’t like to hold resentment towards my daughter or husband but the stress level has gotten me there.  And the nights are rough.  I hate when bedtime comes; I hate it with a passion.

This morning, I was so frustrated with what happened last night that I did something very drastic today.  Frank is going to be very, very upset when he finds out so I am not going to say what I did yet.  (Just in case he is reading this at work!)  On Tuesday it will be revealed to all and I’m praying that it was worth it.

After I got my frustration out of me and I was done doing what I did, I stopped, looked to the heavens and just wanted some type of approval.  I believe God gives us all crosses but He also gives us the knowledge to do something about them.  You can’t just pray and expect an answer to fall in your lap.  You have to use your mind, the mind God gave you, and do something about it.  So I did; and I’m praying that I did right.

I accept my cross and I will carry it and I won’t expect God to take it away.  I know people who have heavier crosses then I, thus I have no right to pass on my cross.  I’m just lucky to be able to have such a small cross at this time in my life.

Sleep, sleep, where are thou?  Oh how we miss you so.  The sleeping situation is still a pain but we’ve figured out what the issue is and why everything fell apart.  In the matter of five days, Mary Rene went through the following:

• Fever from teething
• Teething
• Mom and dad’s bed out of her room
• Stopped nursing
• Classical radio station went off air

All this lead to her jumping out of the crib which made us move her to the toddler bed, which is another change in her life.  We realize our baby girl is overloaded and having a hard time adapting.  So, we took the couch cushions from the front room and put them by her toddler bed.  We’ve been doing the same nighttime routine but now we lay on the cushions until she falls asleep.

Unfortunately, she is still having a hard time settling and it is taking any where from one hour to two hours to put her to bed.  So exhausting for us.  In the middle of the night, she wakes up and walks into our room and smiles as she falls asleep between us.  Frank calls it her ‘victory face.’

I was on the phone with a nurse from her doctor’s office yesterday and we were talking about a completely different issue.  The nurse basically said, “whatever you are doing now (regarding the other situation) is going to change when the new baby gets here because her world is going to be turned upside down.  So expect to go through change again.”  Well, that same philosophy applies to the sleeping situation.  Frank and I talked about it and decided our new plan of action would be:

• Same bedtime routine
• While Frank is doing his 20 minutes, I turn off all the lights in the house and get into my bed
• Frank only stays in her room for 20 minutes and then kisses her good night
• When Mary Rene comes running out of her room, she will come in bed with me, like she does every night
• Mary Rene falls asleep, I leave the room to go hang out with Frank (same thing we used to do, several months ago, before she was in the crib)

When we go to bed, we might move her back into her toddler bed.  We are not sure about this yet but we want her to get used to sleeping in her bed.  We know this routine is “tricking” her but honestly, we can’t keep doing what we’ve been doing the last week.  We both are so frustrated that we are taking it out on each other and well, our marriage is an important part of our family dynamic.  And since we are so close to the due date, knowing that things will probably change anyway, we would rather have some relaxing weeks of sleep while we can.  Cause ya know, newborns don’t sleep!

And we keep reminding ourselves, this is a short time in our lives.  In a few years she is going to be a big girl, going to school, and won’t want to snuggle in bed with mommy and daddy.  And well, that is going to break our hearts.  Right now she needs us and we need to give her what she needs.

Which is making us consider buying a king size mattress.

I digress.

Mary Rene still likes to talk on her play phone but now she likes to take my phone and watch the videos I recorded of her.  Every time my phone rings she starts saying, “pictures, pictures” and will get the biggest smile on her face until she gets to watch the videos.  Frank will call me on his way home from work, around 5:05-5:10 p.m. and when we get off the phone, Mary Rene will watch videos on the couch.  She seriously will watch videos until he walks in the door, about 5:35-5:45 p.m.  Girl loves her some videos.  (And this allows me to cook dinner in peace.)

I was watching her watch videos and I saw this young little lady on my couch.

Seriously, she is growing up way too fast.  She is a toddler moving on to a tween.  Oh gosh, please stop time.  But I must say, I love pulling her hair back in a ponytail so you can really see her face.  Oh she is a precious one.

Mary Rene is still closing her eyes when she smiles.

Before I take a picture I’ll say, “keep your eyes open” and she will keep one open to watch but closes the other to smile.  So funny.

Mary Rene has also learned how to use my camera.  While I was helping Frank and his dad work on the canopy for the baby shower, Mary Rene was taking pictures.  She took about five pictures of the grass and one of my butt.  One day we were sitting on the couch and she took a picture of me rubbing her foot, like I said, girl has a foot fetish.

Mary Rene didn’t get a nap the day of the baby shower and we were worried that she would be crabby.  But luckily there were a bunch of kiddos there to keep the crab spells away.  I think Mary Rene interacts with kids really good and is pretty loving.  Her sweet friend Natalie was there and she wanted to hold her hand when they played.

So sweet.  Mary Rene is a little lover.  Natalie fell on the slide and Mary Rene looked up, saw her crying, and wanted to help.  So she grabbed Natalie’s sippy cup off the ground and handed it to her.  Because we all know, sippy cups make you feel better.  And Natalie felt better (nothing to do with the sippy cup but was her mom & dad’s love) and they went back to playing on the slide.

Mary Rene has been talking in this different voice and I can’t tell if it has to do with the new tooth/teeth or what.  But the new voice is allowing her words to be clearer and she can say bigger words, like picture and elephant.  She has been saying little phrases as well so maybe the new voice comes with her talking clearer and longer.  Not sure but it is interesting.

Hopefully next week will have better updates regarding sleeping!  Wish us luck!

As if the growing belly didn’t already point to the obvious, reality is setting in that we will have another member in our family soon.  This weekend, my Jeep went from this

to this…

wooh.  We went ahead and installed the car seat now because the local firefighter who is certified to install car seats  is heading out of town for two weeks.  Then we would be heading out of town and that takes us to August.  Since Frank was off we did it and now…

we realize how much bigger this family is getting. 

My five passenger Jeep is now a four passenger Jeep thanks to two huge car seats.  Which means (a) no more car rides for Sophie (b) my mom has to ride to church separate on Sundays and (c) less grocery bag room.

The infant seat takes up so much space that the driver’s seat is sitting really close  to the steering wheel.  Thankfully Frank and I are short.  It will definitely be uncomfortable for the long drives to Piedmont but manageable.

The limited space not only smacked reality in our face that we are having another kiddo soon but it also made us start discussing a bigger vehicle.  Will we become a van family?  I actually learned to drive an automatic on a minivan so I have experience but will it really happen someday?

The only way to make more room in the Jeep is to move Mary Rene behind the driver’s seat and switch her to forward facing.  That will make the passenger side tighter but really, the driver needs more space.  But this solution has two issues from the firefighter’s point of view (a) Mary Rene is safer rear facing until she is 30 pounds (she is 24 pounds now) and (b) the infant should be behind the driver.  So I’m feeling a little torn.

Deal with the tightness in our current Jeep or upgrade?

We did not realize that adding a car seat would cause so much heartache.  Good thing we got the seat installed two months before my due date so we have time to think!

On a lighter note, I was driving Mary Rene to grandma’s yesterday and I looked in my rear view mirror to see her through the mirror in front of her seat.  When I was done glancing at her I then glanced at the other seat.  Oh, two little precious ones to gaze at while I am driving.  I can’t wait.

Oh what a week.  If it hasn’t been one thing it has been another.  So many changes in such a short amount of time that I can see why this girl is feeling overloaded.  On top of coming home to her own room, she weaned in the same week.  These two changes didn’t really effect her at first but within days it all came crashing down…and still is.

Since Mary Rene used to nurse to nap, we have had to figure out a new nap routine.  I’m starting to get a new routine down but the first few days were bloody rough with a lot of crying and fighting.  By the time I got her to nap, I was ready for a nap!  (Oh if I didn’t have to work from home.)  My original goal was to start getting her to nap in her toddler bed but that went out the window when she stopped nursing.  So I decided to keep some consistency and I would let her nap in my bed like she has done for the last year.  But Mary Rene had a different plan in mind.  She wanted me to stand up and rock her but this is a habit that I was not about to start.  Grandma Joanne already does this and it wears her out.  With a second baby on the way, I’m not going to have time to rock Mary Rene to nap everyday.  So I had to put my foot down right away.   Instead I am cuddling her for a few minutes and then placing her in my bed like my mom does.  At first she really resisted but after a few minutes she lays down and falls asleep.  With this new routine she was napping two hours again like she did when she nurse napped.  So that made me very happy.  Although it is stressful getting there, the end result pays off.  Hopefully it will get easier as time passes.

Strangely, she still is asking to nurse, sometimes will even put her mouth around it, but ends up staring at my boob before finally settling for cuddle time.

Yesterday was her best nap of the week and it happened at my parent’s house.  Funny how she never napped there and now it is the easiest place to get her to sleep!  When she gave me the cue that she was ready for her nap, I picked her up, cuddled for a few minutes and then placed her in the “nap room.”  She fell asleep within minutes.  And how precious does she look when she is napping.

But then sometimes she rolls to her side and looks even sweeter.

Oh breathtaking.

If only getting her to bed at night was as sweet.  We had a good thing going and Frank and I were gloating in our bedroom routine.  Until…all those changes took place.  Now we can’t get her to bed at all.  The night time routine is so off that she can’t comprehend sleep and we just don’t know what to do.  She got so mad about the sleeping situation that Sunday night she decided to climb out of her crib…and fell on the hardwood floor.  Ouch.  After that we decided it was time to switch things up even more and make her sleep in the toddler bed.  Needless to say, she ended up in our bed last night after struggling for over two hours to get her to sleep.  Ugh.

But on to the fun stuff.

Nearly every night, Frank has been doing a workout tape and Mary Rene likes to stand right in front of him and stomp her feet while he is doing jumping jacks and other moves.  I have been complaining nonstop about my thunder thighs so Frank was a sweetie and found a leg workout for me.  Of course, Mary Rene has to join me too.

Like I said in a previous post, work is fun to kids.

Check out Mary Rene’s car.

Sweet free ride wouldn’t you say?  Another treasure my parents found on the side of the road.  Mary Rene had to check and make sure all the bells and whistles, and engine worked before she drove her car into the sunset.

The phone works too, but papa quickly reminded her not to talk and drive at the same time.

Even though we have had a stressful weekend regarding sleeping, we had a lot of fun.  Frank was off Friday and Monday so we spent a lot of time together as a family.

We enjoyed some time at the park on Saturday and went to a 4th of July parade on Sunday.  The parade happened to go right past a friend’s house so we were invited to a 4th of July party there.  And I must say, we had rock star parking and front row tickets to the parade.  It was a great set up.

Mary Rene really enjoyed the parade, didn’t sit down once, as she grabbed all the candy off the ground and put it in her bag.  After the parade, we went in the backyard and Mary Rene got to play in the bounce castle.

When we were at the water park about two weeks ago, Mary Rene noticed some kids going down the water slide backwards.  Now, she goes down slides backwards too.

Girl cracks me up.

So even though we had a stressful week of sleeping, we had a lot of fun.  Here’s to another week of fun…and hopefully better sleep.